Foundations of Self Esteem
Do we, as parents, Love our children more if they achieve or do
we give them our Love so they have a firm foundation with which to achieve??
we give them our Love so they have a firm foundation with which to achieve??
We are more often raised with the belief that Love is a reward. We cannot be respected or admired or Loved without some level of performance or achievement. we go through life as performers and achievers thinking - when I ' do this' then I will finally be loveable. It soon becomes an addiction and eventually our achievements never seem enough - never will be enough - we keep on doing and doing and doing, perpetually! It lowers our self esteem, we create doubts about ourselves and if we measure up - limiting our future.
As Christians
Does God Love us more if we achieve or does He give us His Love
so we have a firm foundation with which to achieve??
so we have a firm foundation with which to achieve??
We are taught to believe that God would love us if and when we are good and change our ways - perform for Him so to speak. It is the way we are taught as young Christians and carry these thoughts into our adult life - be good, change your ways and God will reward you. But as in our daily lives if we continue in this way we will spend our lives always feeling we fall short and we never seem to be good enough or change enough. Creating low self esteem and doubts in ourselves as Christians. In fact what we forget is that it is 'Love' that changes us. It is not the reward for change - it is Gods, unconditional, given Love that will bring about the change. It is the experience of that Love that becomes the power to Change. More often it is our common religion that gives the inferior message - that God Loves us when I change, when I achieve (moralism) You are never holy enough, pure enough, refined enough or loving enough.
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shuh, what did I say?????........................*smile*...................I believe in God's unconditional love for me. As I have given my life to him, he will shape me how he wants me and use me where he needs to. At times I can feel he pulls the rein in a bit, I tend to go off hop scotch in my own direction at times and have to be reminded who is boss. I also tend to worry too much and stress and rant and rave, then sometimes I get knocked on the head and told to keep quiet for a bit and listen. lol
ReplyDeleteThank you Keith for your thoughts this morning, I appreciate it and your wise words and your help with my problem. God is good, I will post a blog later, but can tell you that both kids got jobs now, Mel started last week and Kenneth will start on Monday. *smile*
I thought I might get more people looking if I mention your name in the title hahaha!!!
ReplyDeleteYour reply made me think of the scripture about humble sparrows and the one which fell from the box - that prompted the thoughts on the blog. Also your story of how out of the love in your heart you picked up the little baby bird and in a way gave it back it's life and keep you eye on it's progress - sort of reminded me of the words - Are not two sparrows sold for a copper coin? And not one of them falls to the ground apart from your Father’s will. Anyway thats the basis of the provocation from your words.
I think we need to go off on our own like you mention. It is how we grow - some of the troubles we get ourselves into bring about the biggest and everlasting changes! So keep playing hop scotch untill you get sick of the turmoil the choice to do so always brings. I also believe that our pastoral leaders and denominations cause so much pain from incorrect and prideful teaching. Whenever I get an oportunity I like to write things like this and in my own way point out some of the errors of our religious leaders interpretaions. They can set too high a bar to overcome and send too many in the wrong direction. But I think it all good - God always sends someone along to put u backin our nesting box!!
doubt it, you should have mentioned someone more popular, like a celebrity or admin of a group, lol.
ReplyDeleteMaybe you are right - noone else has replied but you hahaha!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteso agree with you there, Keith. Scary some of the teachings.
ReplyDeletelet them wake up first , hehee, otherwise change the name to someone else and see what that does. LOL
ReplyDeleteyes that is true, very true. Can think of a few people that over the years has picked me up and put me back. *smile*
ReplyDeleteYes me too - thankfully I for sure would not be alive today me thinks!
ReplyDeleteYes I think so - it is not to attack them really because I believe it is all good but I like to present another perspective hopefully in a realy way and not from pride
ReplyDeleteme neither.................................................but that story is for a whole other day.
ReplyDeleteYou are so right, Keith, but it took a long time to discover that what we were told, simply wasn't the essence of God's love. We are simply loved just as we are..to discover that, is truly liberating and what I put into being born again.
ReplyDeleteAmen.
ReplyDeleteAmen
ReplyDeleteSo true and Beautifully said.
It feels good to have Christian friends online :)
ReplyDeleteIt does and I like, too, the freedom to share the experience here on multiply and tohave friends like you and others who have the same convictions - also those who do not but enjoy to share anyway. (L)
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ReplyDeleteAs you I find that when I do take some pictures there is something always within value. Value often inspires within faith and that of which we render.
ReplyDeleteI was brought up in a Roman Catholic Convent from the age of three to 11yrs and, it is because of what I was taught I am now not religious at all.
ReplyDeleteHowever, I do respect everyone for their own beliefs. Live and let live.
Thanks Shayna for your comment. I was raised and schooled Catholic too! I am not religious and like you I respect others beliefs. I am, though, a committed Christian although do not belong to any church nor any denomination. It is my faith that sustains me not a religion. I like to write about things like the above in the same way others on multiply write about life, and how we cope with it, quoting Eckhart Tolle or Mooji or Eienstein or Jung and many other teachers and writers and probably what I write wouold be more accepted if I did so. My preference is Jesus and to show too that beautiful truths we can use in our daily lives are there in His teachings if people care to look instead of dismiss because of their experiences of Christianity. The writing above is about not using Love as a reward but instead to Love to encourage others and I added the second part for my Christian friends and how this same lesson refers to us as Christians. I could have just as easily quoted Tolle and all the others to explain the same basic teaching to what I wanted to share.
ReplyDeleteI believe we all need something to use as a cornerstone in our lives to give it meaning whether Jesus, Tolle or Darwin! But when it comes down to it it is the understanding of basic truths like above that help deliver us from misguided ways we have been taught no matter who teaches us. I write really about myself and what has helped me - sharing what has helped me and where I got them from.
Thanks Jack and too for your supporting and wise words in the audio. Thanks for reading and commenting
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